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10 November 2005

the Mullahs of Kansas, the Ayatollahs of Washington DC -- wilkommen nach diese Neue Republik von Gilead

U.B. schriebe:

Is Kansas run by Mullahs,now?Uwe


Ach, you make the Joke.

So why are so many Americans of Good Will and Hope weeping?

Why are the Good, Decent, Generous Christians of America weeping?

You know I am not a Christian, so I am uncomfortable making Vast, Sweeping Generalizations about historical matters regarding American Christianity.

I am not an Equestrian, either, but I notice when the Pferd steps on my Foos and will not get off, and I have Strong Opinions about this.

Yes. We have Christian Mullahs. We have always had them.

In some eras/epochs we do a very good job of mostly ignoring them, or the Zeit just naturally makes fewer of them. In some eras/epochs, the churches of America's Christian Mullahs are empty, lonely churches. A few people in the front pews straining to hear the Mullah's rantings and ravings. But most American ignore the few Christian Mullahs.

When young Lutheran Pastor Dietrich Bonhoeffer came to America, the Christians he saw in America, I think from my readings, made the home he had made in his Herz for Jesus very warm and happy. His Faith was strengthened, invigorated by the Zeit of Christianity in America.

Perhaps he saw the response American Christians and their Leaders were making for the great, dismal economic Depression. He saw Christian leaders stoking the fires of human generosity and love so neighbors could do the best they could to take care of their neighbors in those Hard Times.

But then Bonhoeffer knew he had to return home, where the old, powerful Lutheran Mullahs (the elected Bishops) were saying and urging such terrible things. He could have stayed in America. He knew what would happen to him if he came back home.

But of course Jesus also makes some of His best believers into Brave Fools. Or much much worse, some of the best Christian women and men feel compelled to follow Jesus on the back of the donkey into Jerusalem just in time for Easter. Bonhoeffer was one of these.

Okay, this has Not Been Easy, but the deutsches Department of the University of Vleeptron / Lake-of-Lava Campus, has found me the title of ein Roman von Margaret Atwood: "Der Report der Magd." Which of course means it is for sale in Berlin, or for easy shoplifting, or in the library. In the original, it is "The Handmaid's Tale." Ms. Atwood is a Canadian writer of the greatest talent and importance.

(You know my fondness for Boll and Grass, Atwood is in the same ballpark for English literature in North America. Maybe not quite yet Nobel-class ... but actually she could someday surprise everybody and make Canada very proud. If the Austrian Mieskeit with the Whining Unenjoyable Porno can win a Nobel ...)

But "Der Report der Magd" is not about Canada.

It is about America in the (near future) Time of the Christian Mullahs, when the Mullahs have won the struggle between the Loving Gott and the Gott of Hating and Cruelty.

In this future, America has changed its name to The Republic of Gilead. The Mullahs make the Laws. And inforce them as they believe God wants them inforced: Brutally, with Great Cruelty.

And no one can escape the New American Ayatollahs. (Except by fleeing, at great risk, across the border to Canada. Which has always happened in American history when we are having a big Christian Mullah problem or Slavery problem or Vietnam problem.)

Now I will stop and not spoil the story for anybody.

But to read "The Handmaid's Tale" begs the question: Was this woman crazy? Was she hallucinating? Surely America could never become this terrible Republic of Gilead. She had this hallucination in 1985.

Wilkommen nach diese Neue Republik von Gilead. It's here. It's what's happenin', baby.

Our famous and world-admired strict Constitutional Separation of Church and State ... the Mullahs, with the help and approval of George Bush and his Inner Circle, have spat on it and torn this beautiful 215-year-old tapestry to shreds. The Mullahs use the First Amendment for toilet paper in these American times.

You noticed in these stories that in just this Monkey Business (Affengesellschaft) of Intelligent Design and Creationism taught in Schools, Bush has publicly said he believes it is good for America's science students to learn both the theory of Natural Selection AND this verkakte (Yiddish, don't know how that flies auf deutsches) Intelligent Design. He says: Now our kids can learn Twice the Science by learning about Both Theories! :-)

patspub says in Helvetia also, parents are going on the warpath (Kriegstrasse?) if the school teaches their kids Natural Selection. Well -- Helvetia used to have a Mullah named Jean Chauvin / John Calvin.

Today, the Christian Mullahs have unprecedented political power and influence all over America, and worst of all, with the federal government in Washington, in Congress and in the White House.

Want to be scared? Check out an organization called Focus on the Family. Be scared of their beliefs. Be scared of their activities.

But most of all: Be scared of their POWER. They are a big part of why George Bush is President.

I have a friend who is a political activist in Ottawa (actually he is running for Parliament on the Let's All Get Naked and Have a Big Party Party). In his e-mails to all his friends and supporters (many) in America and Canada, he routinely refers to his Neighbor to the South as The Republic of Gilead. He gets very amused when Americans ask What Is That? What Do You Mean? Where Is The Republic of Gilead? Never heard of that.

If this goes on much longer, I don't know how history will judge our American Christian Mullahs -- worse than the Taliban, worse than the Ayatollahs? I don't know.

Once you have a Brane Farte that tells you that God Is Driving, your car can go Anywhere, there are no red lights or stop signs or speed limits.

But I do know that our American Mullahs are TRYING VERY HARD to win this unhappy miserable Contest.

Again, Christianity is not my Faith.

But Jesus is weeping for America right now. The way Bonhoeffer wept after he came home. I can see that as clearly as I feel the Pferd standing on my Foos.

[VLEEPTRON TECHNICAL NOTICE: The High Non-Junk Science Council of Vleeptron has just decided to stop entirely with trying to use Special Characters like öçñüáÊð. Vleeptron is tired of writing and receiving Lottery Spam e-mails from Espaca.]


Anonymous patfromch said...

But then Bonhoeffer knew he had to return home, where the old, powerful Lutheran Mullahs (the elected Bishops)

I really don't want to be a smartass here but the Lutheran (Protestant) Church doesn't have any Bishops. That's a part of the Catholic thing. Most of the Christians who are messing around in your part of the world are Evangelicals, as far as I know.
I could tell you the difference between Protestand and Catholic, but don't ask me about those Evangelicals.
I don't like thos fundamentalist Bastards. Thus far they are only small in number here in Switzerland and have not done much damage. They are growing slowly and someday they might come out of the woodwork, maybe not. I HOPE not.
I will keep you updated anyway

Oh btw warpath heisst Kriegspfad
(bekackte is also ok, I use that every day. Didn't know I was swearing in yiddish..)

Blogger Bob Merkin said...


The Bavarian Roman Catholic cardinal and Lutheran bishop to counteract prejudice against "Gypsies" in their churches. The West German justice minister telegraphed his personal support for the Sinti Cause.


During the Hitler regime, except for individual acts of resistance, the established churches were unable or unwilling to mount a serious challenge to the supremacy of the state. A Nazi, Ludwig Müller, was installed as the Lutheran bishop in Berlin.


When [Bonhoeffer] was denounced by the Lutheran Oberkonsistorialrat and later bishop Theodor Heckel as a "pacifist and enemy of the state" and was banned from teaching in all German theological faculties, there was no protest at all from church circles. Only the small church of the Council of Brethren remained loyal to him.

As late as 1953 the Bavarian Lutheran bishop Meiser refused to take part in a memorial service for Bonhoeffer in Flossenbürg on the grounds that he had been a member of the political resistance and not a church martyr for the sake of Christian faith.


and this entire site, this site got Lutheran Bishops falling out of the trees:

Anonymous patfroch said...

AH ! Now I see who you mean
Misunderstanding on my side, sorry bewt that. good to know I'm not even a smartass, I'm just a normal ass.

Blogger Bob Merkin said...

Is this a translation problem? We say "bishop" (for the chess piece as well as the Big High & Mighty Church Official). Was ist diese Grosse Macher von der Kirche auf deutsches? My Translator Robot says "Bischof."

(EXTRA CREDIT: Bitte, all the other names of all the other chess pieces

rook or castle

and the word "chess".

Anonymous patfromch said...

Yup, a translation problem indeed (and a bit of stupidity on my part. I had initially thoutght that the Lutheran Church would not have any Bishops (Bischof indeed) because that was wath Luther rebelled against in the first place. )
Now over to the Sports Desk
Chess = Schach
King = König
Queen = Königin
Pawn = Bauer
Bishop = Läufer
Knight = Springer
Rook or castle = Turm
(Before you ask: No, I can't play chess, I' too dumb for that. I'd rather play a nice round of Pool Billiard.


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