Elmer & Benny, bestester friends than Spongebob & Patrick!
The Impolitic has referred Vleeptron to two blog pages of Baby Gargoyles, which look suspiciously like Kittens.
She (I think I finally got that right) and one of her colleague Bloggers have discovered a terrible Secret Scandal and are telling all America the Truth:
Kittens are actually Liberals. Or Liberals are actually Kittens. I'm not exactly sure what the Message exactly is.
But something must be done immediately. The Safety and Future of America depend on it.
(Does this mean that Conservatives are really Dogs?)
Anyway, I can't contribute much to this new Discovery, but just this week SWMBO figured out how to liberate the photos trapped inside our new digital camera, and to my astonishment, there were many photos of Liberals in the camera -- I guess someone must be using the camera for a sort of Political Porn Fest.
Here's an Example: 2 Liberals wrestling.
Oh, okay, they're just Cats.
The Cat on top is Elmer (officially Bubba Sans' Elmer -- this Thing has a longer and much fancier pedigree than I do). He's a Maine Coon Cat, the largest breed of domestic cat on Earth -- huge already, but apparently he still has a considerable Growth Spurt ahead.
He just looks raccoon-ish, but that's a myth that he's part raccoon.
But it's not a myth that he's part bobcat, wildcat -- it's increasingly obvious that a few hundred generations ago, there was some sort of unfortunate Dating Mistake in the Maine woods, and Elmer is the result.
He hunts rabbits. Successfully. And always brings us the tastier, meatier half. Not wishing to confuse him or hurt his feelings or lower his self-esteem, we always put on an elaborate theatrical show of praise and excitement when we discover the latest carcass he's dragged into the living room.
(SWMBO explains that Cats never Fell -- they are entirely free of any taint of Original Sin -- and thus can be neither Good nor Evil.)
The Cat on the bottom of the wrestling match is Elmer's bestest bestest friend Benny -- short for Benedict Spinoza. Benny is a fairly standard Alley Cat, a former Shelter Cat, and has the Happiest, Friendliest Disposition of any Living Creature I know. He doesn't seem to even know the Concept Notions of Bite or Scratch. I don't even think he understands what Unhappiness or Fear are.
He and Elmer hunt together. Nothing that flies, scampers or hops is safe when they're off a-hunting.
We have two other cats, Priscilla -- a bit high-strung, perhaps neurasthenic -- and the Screaming Shrieking Meezer (Siamese) Scarlet-Charlotte. I'll post their portraits later.
So we have 4 Cats.
I'm not saying we have No Mice.
But I am saying we have Very Few Mice. And they are Very Frightened Mice. And they are Hiding.